True Reflections of A Spiritual Seeker

Jun 23, 2004, 12.00am IST
Robert Carr.

We had not met before, but my new friend knew something of my interest in spirituality. He also knew that I knew U G Krishnamurti, the sage-teacher. There is so much to know, he said, that I don't know where to start.



Look, I said, all the questions we have are born of the answers we already know. We tend to ask the same questions that mankind has been asking since the beginning of time. But we are not satisfied with the answers.


Yes, he said. I want to know for myself — I am not interested in stereotyped readymade explanations. They don't bring about any peace or understanding.

Look my friend, have you ever asked yourself, is there anything to know and how do I know anything at all? You want to be certain that what you know is real and not just some imagined idea. Yes, that's right, he said, I can't get anywhere with the different gurus I've met... They just give the ready answers that I have heard over and over again.


True, the world is a mess; you and I have created this world, the greed, the inhumanity of man, and the destruction of nature.

Everywhere man is in conflict with himself and the world around him. We have created a mess, and so we will have to pay the price. Right, he said, but we will have to set it straight. How?


He fell silent, looking at the floor and then at me. We will become enlightened and that will change the world, he says. I ask, will you become enlightened?

Trying to be something that you are not is not possible. The very want is no different than any other want that we might have. The Sanyasi wants to find liberation, the poor man wants to be rich and you want all this and heaven, too.

The wants you have are not really yours but your gurus have created the want to be in some other state that you think will solve all your problems that you think you have.

But why do you say the gurus have created the wants in me? Down the ages man has tried to discover life's meaning, the purpose of living, whether there is a God or release from suffering...and to attain to some spiritual state where all the questions are understood by some experience, a transcendent mystical union with the ultimate.

What you are is the past. That knowledge is colouring your perception with images that are just the memories that mankind has collected and put before you as the goal to reach. So the goal that you have is using you to express the wants of others...

What you are saying is too much; you are asking me to put an end to searching. You cannot stop the momentum that is pushing you to struggle and try to find the ans-wers to your questions.

What you call You is the question; you are no different than that. You are full of thoughts about this and that. You are planning the future every moment of your life; you want to keep your thoughts, your dreams and hopes going on and on. What you are is just a continuity of thoughts, thoughts that belong to the deep stream of consciousness that we are all part of.

That consciousness is only interested in continuing its pattern of repeating over and over what it knows. That knowledge is misery; the struggle to keep intact all the memories, beliefs and that is the content of our culture.

He was silent for a moment; he saw the implications of what we were talking about. After some time he smiled and asked if we could meet again?

(The writer has authored 'God Man Con Man'.)

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